Girls: Are you tired of being asked to homecoming with the stereotypical red roses and poster with the clever words, wait for it… “HOMECOMING”? Are you sick and tired of the lack of creativity coming from your boyfriend these days? And boys, are you tired of these ungrateful high school girls not appreciating your creativity? Are you tired of being turned down? Are you tired of being dateless? Well thanks to these foolproof ideas to ask your lady to prom, you’ll be sure to make all of your friends jealous, AND show up to the dance with the hottest girl in school… or at least here’s to hoping.

1. Buy a cheap alarm alarm clock and write “I hope I’m not too late, so will you be my Homecoming date?” on it. Set the alarm and hide it somewhere (in her backpack, or tape it to the bottom of her desk). Have the alarm set to a desired time, therefore, it will go off in the middle of class and you’ll be waiting by her classroom door to answer her prayers.

2. Step one, find a gorilla suit. Step two, put that gorilla suit on and rock it. Step three, spell out “Homecoming” on her porch with bananas and ring the doorbell. Now if she doesn’t run away screaming or turn away with disgust, this idea is sure to get you your date of choice.

3.  Put one end of a very long string on her porch or at her classroom door and lead it wherever you want… down the hallway, around the principle, into the boys bathroom… okay maybe not the bathroom. But, at the beginning, say, “I’m not just stringing you along, keep going,” until they reach the location where you can stand with roses, chocolates, etc.

4. Anybody have a dog that is just Hollywood worthy? Grab an adorable fluffy friend and tie a sign around his neck that reads “Homecoming?” Have him sit at her doorstep and hide off to the side. Talk to her parents beforehand to make sure they answer the door.

5. Everybody’s seen or heard of the candy letter posters that use different bars to replace letters. However, this one is by far the most clever one out there. Plus, this idea is pretty easy to put together and easy to pull off. Just purchase the candy bars and a poster board and you’re set. You can pretty much set it wherever you want; in their room, in their classroom, or in their car.