The Apple Leaf

Mason Dalbeck
It’s ya boi, Mr.Stealyogirl, A.K.A. Mason Dalbeck.Your day has been blessed with the presence of my staff profile, and you are now a better human being for having read this work of art. I manage the money and sell the highest quality advertisements this side of the Mississippi. When I’m not hustlin’ and bustlin’ in the pub room, you can catch me livin’ in da cold hard streets of Wenatchee playing lacrosse. Now, many people have asked me “Mason, how are you so successful and attractive?”. My answer to this often asked question is a simple five step process passed down through the generations of Dalbecks. Step one: Never admit you’re wrong, even when you are, just ride it out. Step two: Drive a 2002 subaru outback with a roof rack and racing fin for +5 speed. Step 3: Roll your pants cuffs up two rolls no matter what the weather. Step 4: flannel every darn day. The last step to being successful and attractive all the time is arguably the most important… acquire job as The Apple Leaf’s business manager, science shows that ladies love guys in financial jobs.

Mason Dalbeck, Business Manager

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